THE NAME SOUNDS FAMILIAR

Picture it. Teeny-town USA. Late 90s. Me tossing clothes left and right, shoes back and forth and occasionally spilling baby powder everywhere—ok, not so different than now—but back then I had TV. I wasn't living in NYC. And I would get dressed to The Bloomberg Report every morning before high school. The Bloomberg Report was like The Weather Channel sans the elevator music—both entertaining enough to keep you company but not entertaining enough to cause you to put your left shoe on your right foot or vice versa But I never knew that “Bloomberg” was the same as this Bloomberg.
Who knew?! Just when I was beginning to feel sorry for him—poor thing 'n' all what will he do after he leaves office etc...? I realize he can pretty much do whatever he wants after he leaves office. Let me put it like this, it’s one thing to be in The Wall Street Journal. It’s another thing to BE The Wall Street Journal. Who is this mayor of mine? He’s an Aquarius—which gives him great…ok, ok, I’m bias there but that’s all that I know. But I bet he’s written a book—everyone’s written a book. I just finished Autobiography of Andrew Carnegie by Andrew Carnegie. Don’t ask. I’ll explain how I came to read that book later—just know that it was standing outside of Carnegie Hall (March 21, 2007 ) that brought about the creation of my website.
Now, I was about to start the The Code of Jewish Ethics by Rabbi Joseph Telushkin—my fingerprints are all over the single copy at a certain midtown bookseller so the least I can do (after weeks of quick reading) is buy it, right? I get paid on the 15th, so we’ll see. And I KNOW everyone is like why don’t you just order from Amazon.com ?
Well, I would but I don’t have a mailbox key—and sometimes I run into the postman and he’s like “No more mail can fit in the box” or “Your mailbox is full tell…”
You see, my mailbox-key-having-housemate travels often, but he has apartment seniority and so I dare not ask for the key…What?! I know. I know… Listen, I tried to get a P.O. Box the other day, but it seems these boxes are like virgins in this city.
“Sweetheart," said the postal clerk , "there are none available." "Those are real hard to come by around here.”